To Just Be

I am lying down, face up, on a hard wood floor.  Every piece of my physical body sinks to its utter base to meet the earth of these very hard wood floors.  Four walls of the room coddles its own heavy warm air.  My eyes are closed, relaxed, soft.  I take this moment to rest, reflect, and rest again... when else will I have this chance.  I relish this moment.  Relish this moment.  This moment.  Moment.  It's all I want, all I need... a moment to just be.

The most pure silence reveals quiet footsteps coming towards me and delicately, respectfully, stepping around me.  I sense the other body stepping over me.  I feel the subtle vibrations in the floor, I smell his breath.  Breath of a pure stranger.  I must trust him.  I take my own breath of anticipation, quickly followed by a devoted Pranayama (breath control.)  I remind myself that I am safe here.  I am safe here.  Just breathe.

My Yogi positions himself over me.  I lie open and vulnerable, blind and open.  His hands gently and firmly push my stubborn shoulder blades down further into the Earth.  It hurts.  I imagine, someone else must find some relief in this.  I don't.  It makes me wonder, why do I hold so much weight, so much resistance, so much pain in my weak shoulders?

Why do I hold so much in my weak shoulders? 
I painfully realize the reflection in all of this.

I am lying down, face up, on a damp forest floor.  I am too young.  Every piece of my physical body sinks to its utter base to meet the earth of this very unforgiving dirt.  I am too young.  Open walls of a dark sky and a chill in the air.  My eyes are closed, anxious, fearful.  I have no moment to reflect, why would I.  I am too young.  I smell his breath.  Breath of a pure stranger.  I do not trust him.  I take my own breath of anticipation.  I have this chance to relish this moment.  I am too young. There is nothing, absolutely nothing, of this moment to relish.  I am too young.  All that is left is just enough to make a young girl's life awfully confusing and difficult for awhile...

Lying down, face up, on a wood floor, sinking into my Earth.  All I have to do is breathe and let the Earth support me.  The vibrations of his footsteps fade into peaceful silence.

xoxo Breeze